


You Dive Me Crazy

by orphan_account



Series: Lesbian Jalex [3]
Category: All Time Low
Genre: Bisexuality, F/F, Genderswap, lesbian jalex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-02
Updated: 2016-05-10
Packaged: 2018-04-24 10:32:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4916149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack lives are normal life, she has her friends and an amazing boyfriend. She’s even befriended the new girl Alex who is making her feel things she never had before</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Third genderswap… I’m a lesbian and I ship Jalex leave me alone. (I’m lesbian Jalex trash tbh)

“Jack, come on!” Lynn called to her friend, tapping her trimmed fingernails on steering wheel. Jack quickly stuffed the rest of her belongings into her school bag and ran out the front door to Lynn’s car.

 

“Hey.” Jack said, settling into the passenger seat. “Ready for a year of senior fun?”

 

“I’m just ready to get out of here.” Lynn muttered.

 

“Why would you want to leave good old Baltimore?” Jack asked, a smile stretching her lips.

 

“That’s not very punk of you.” Lynn joked.

 

Jack rolled her eyes. “Whatever. I don’t even know what I want to major in college.”

 

“You’ll figure it out.” Lynn shrugged. “What about Brian? Is he staying in town?”

 

Brian was Jack’s boyfriend of a year. Probably one of the sweetest guys Jack knew. She shrugged. “I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it.”

 

“And if you go to different ones?”

 

Jack sighed. “I don’t know; we’ll have to see.” If she were being honest, the idea of a long distance relationship scared her. Brian was sweet and all but she wasn’t sure if she could handle being miles away from him.

 

They got to their high school and met Ashley, Valerie, and Emma outside like they always did. Even though they saw each other a few days before Jack hugged her friends like she hadn’t seen them in years.

 

“God, I can’t believe we’re in our senior year.” Emma said as they walked inside.

 

“I know, I don’t want to adult right yet.” Ashley said, running her fingers through her blue pixie cut. “I’ll miss you guys too much.”

 

“Ugh, don’t be sappy.” Jack laughed. “You could just go to Towson with me.”

 

“You have to get accepted first, Jacqueline.” Valerie said in a singsong voice.

 

“Fuck off, Val.” Jack said, grimacing at her full name. By her locker, she saw a flash of blond hair. She grinned, giving her friends a quick good bye, and jogged over to her boyfriend.

 

“Hey, Bri.” She said, pecking his lips.

 

“Hey.” He smiled back at her. “Late as usual, huh?”

 

She gave him a playful glare as she got her books out of her locker. “Whatever, what do you have first?”

 

“English lit. You?”

 

“I have French.” She said with a small frown. This meant she didn’t have her first class with any of her friends. “Let me see your schedule.”

 

She scanned over Brian’s schedule to find out the only class they had together was math, which was their last class of the day.

 

“At least we’ve got one.” Brian said, giving her a smile to make her feel better.

 

Jack shrugged. “Better than nothing.” She said. “Too bad we both suck at math. I have no one to copy off.”

 

“Well hopefully you’ll let me pay attention.” Brian said with a smirk.

 

“Oh, you’re afraid I’ll distract you?” Jack asked with a smirk.

 

“Yep.”

 

“You mean like this.” She went up on he toes and pressed her lips to his. She backed away a little, close enough that their lips were brushing. “So like this?” she asked again.

 

Brian bit his lip and Jack smirked, knowing the effect she had on him.

 

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Just like that.”

 

“And it’s a bad thing?” she asked, pressing their lips together again.

 

“Yo, horn dogs!” A familiar voice yelled breaking the two apart. “The bell went and if you don’t leave now you’ll be late.” Brian’s friend Stephen continued.

 

“Shit, see ya babe.” Brian said with one last peck on the cheek. Jack gave him one last smile before she made her way to her class. Her teacher was Mr. Franceschi who was infamously an easy-going teacher so she didn’t rush the short walk down the hall.

 

When she got the room she scanned the room to see if anyone she was remotely friends with was there. The room had those two seater desks all the tables were already taken so she couldn’t claim one for herself but she didn’t see anyone she was friends with either.

 

Then her eyes stopped on one girl sitting alone at the desk closest to the window. Her brown hair was long, like really long. It probably went down to her waist. She was wearing a low cut tank top with the triangle thing Jack remembers from Harry Potter printed on it and a beanie even though it wasn’t cold enough to really wear one yet. She was reading a book and had earphones in, much more interested in her own world than what was going on around her.

 

“Ah Jacqueline, just on time.” Mr. Franceschi said, interrupting Jack’s trance.

 

She turned to her teacher. “Good to see you too, Joshua.” She said in her usual smartass manor.

 

“That’s sir or Mr. Franceschi and you know it.”

 

“And you know it’s Jack.” She shrugged.

 

“Touché.” He replied. “Now go take your seat.”

 

Jack scanned the room again and most of the seats were taken. Her eyes went back to the pretty girl that was reading and settled on sitting with her.

 

Wait, did she just call her pretty?

 

She made her way over to the desk and cleared her throat. The girl didn’t seem to hear, so she awkwardly tapped her shoulder. The girl glanced up at her, taking an earphone out.

 

“Okay if I sit here?” Jack asked.

 

The girl smiled at her. “Sure, go ahead.”

 

Jack smiled back at the girl and took her seat. “What’re you listening to?” Jack asked.

 

“Blink-182.”  The girl replied.

 

Jack grinned. “You’re kidding? I love them!”

 

The girl smiled, her eyes sparkling. “Same, best band ever.” She said. “I’m Alex by the way.”

 

“Jack.” She replied. “I haven’t seen you around, you new?”

 

Alex nodded. “Yeah, worst time to be new.” She laughed. “But this school is okay so far. I’m good at French at least.”

 

“I suck at French so I guess I chose a good spot.” Jack joked.

 

Alex gave her another smile, a genuine smile. She gave her this look Jack couldn’t really decipher.

 

Mr. Franceschi interrupted her thoughts, starting the class. Alex took out her other earphone and marked her spot in her book.

 

For whatever reason, she was all Jack could think about during her class.

 

…

 

Lunch finally came, and after getting her poor excuse for food she started over to where the table combined with her friends and Brian’s. Brian was already there, sitting in between his friends Stephen and Josh. She went over to the table with a slight skip in her step.

 

She walked up to Brian from behind, wrapped one arm around his neck and kissed his cheek. She felt him smile in response to the affection.

 

“Hello.” She said.

 

“Hey.” He said and turned his head, pressing his lips to Jack’s.

 

“Gross guys.” Stephen said, scrunching his nose.

 

Jack rolled her eyes and sat in her usual spot in Brian’s lap.

 

“So how’s your day so far?” Ashley asked.

 

“Boring as hell.” Josh said.

 

“At least I got at least one of you bastards in most of my classes.” Jack said.

 

“Yeah, how did lonesome in French go?” Brian asked.

 

“I sat with this new girl. She seemed nice.” Alex shrugged.

 

“What was her name?” Emma asked.

 

“Alex.”

 

“Is she the chick with the long ass hair?” Stephen asked.

 

Jack nodded. “Yeah. She likes Blink.”

 

“Oh cool, you should see if she wants to sit with us if she hasn’t already got people to sit with.” Josh said.

 

Jack nodded in response, liking the sound of that idea.

 

…

 

Her last class finally rolled up and she walked there hand in hand with Brian. Unlike French the classroom had single desks but that didn’t stop Brian and Jack from pushing their desks a little closer towards each other.

 

Before the bell rang Jack saw Alex walk in with a girl with pink hair Jack recognised as Ariel as well as a girl with long brown hair named Chrissy. Jack guessed Alex had made her friends so it was probably useless to ask if she wanted to sit with her and her friends. Jack was surprised by how much this disappointed her.

 

Before Alex found her seat she locked eyes with Jack and she smiled. “Oh hey, Jack.”

 

Jack smiled back at her. “Hey, I guess you made some friends?”

 

Alex nodded. “Yeah, thank god.” She glanced over at Brian and her smile faltered for a moment when she saw how close they were sitting. Jack wasn’t sure what that meant so she ignored it.

 

“Bri, this is Alex, the girl from French.” Jack said. “And Alex, my boyfriend Brian.”

 

Alex sent him a smile. “Hey.” She said. “Nice to meet you.”

 

“You too. How’s hell been?” Brian asked, smiling at Alex.

 

“Fine.” Alex said. “I better take my seat.” She turned and found a desk in between Chrissy and Ariel.

 

“She seems nice.” Brian said. “A little weird but nice.”

 

Jack shrugged. “I guess; she seems kind of nerdy too. But at least I have someone to sit in French with.”

 

Jack didn’t realise how much she was looking forward to French until then, which was weird because she hated French.

 

…

 

Brian stumbled through Jack’s window, trying his best to not knock anything down. When he was all the way in Jack closed the window before wrapping her arms around Brian’s neck and kissing him. They would have to be quiet since she wasn’t allowed to have him in her room, especially this late. But what her parents didn’t know won’t hurt them.

 

“Missed you.” She mumbled, even though she last saw him when she hopped into Lynn’s car, ready for the weekend to begin.

 

He let out a small chuckle and moved his teeth to Jack’s ear, tugging on it gently. They moved to the bed and Jack laid down, letting Brian climb on top of her. They continued to kiss a little longer until they were completely out of breath.

 

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Brian asked.

 

Jack smiled and nodded. “Yeah.”

 

They settled on the Nightmare Before Christmas, Jack resting in Brian’s arms. They always made the joke about being Jack and Sally, two people hopelessly in love (and they both loved that Blink song so it worked).

 

Somewhere along the line Jack dozed off, finding herself deep in her thoughts. She wasn’t in Brian’s arms anymore, she was on her back and a body was above her, soft lips attached to her neck. It wasn’t unusual to have a sex dream but they usually consisted of a hot celebrity or Brian. Hell, she fell asleep pressed up against Brian so that would make the most sense.

 

But last she checked, even in her dreams Brian didn’t have boobs.

 

The figure moved away from her neck and Jack saw the face of Alex.

 

 

“You like that?” Alex asked.

 

Jack bit her lip, because she fucking did. Why was she feeling like this? Alex was a _girl;_ Jack was not into girls.

 

Alex moved to whisper something in Jack’s ear. “God, I am so wet.” She said. She took Jack’s wrist gently and Jack let her move it. Alex was wearing a skirt – a _tiny_ skirt – so it gave easy access for Jack to feel her over her panties. Alex let out a small moan of pleasure. The other girl was indeed wet. And really wet at that. Jack applied pressure against the thin material and Alex let out another moan.

 

“Help me take them off.” Alex said in a breathy voice. Jack bit her lip and hooked her fingers around the waistband to pull town Alex’s lacy panties. Before Jack could apply pressure to Alex without the barrier in the way she woke up.

 

“Oh come on you two.” Jack heard May say in a hushed voice. Jack turned her head to see May at her doorway, silhouetted by the light. Jack realised she was still in Brian’s arms… and she was wet. Really wet.

 

“Don’t tell mom and dad, please.” Jack said quickly.

 

May sighed. “Okay, fine. I was a teenager once too.”

 

“Thank you.” Jack smiled and May rolled her eyes as she closed the door.

 

“You were really out.” Brian said.

 

The dream was still on her mind. Why the hell did she dream that? She’s not a lesbian; she’s _not._ She loved Brian anyway. She loved him to death. She just needed to remind herself of that.

 

She turned around so she was facing him. “Yeah, she woke me up from a pretty great sex dream.”

 

Brian smirked. “Oh really now?”

 

Jack nodded. “Yeah, now I’m horny as fuck.” She pressed her lips to Brian’s neck. “Think you can replicate what you did in my dream.”

 

She didn’t even have to look up to know he smiled at that. She felt really guilty about lying. She’d never lied to him before.

 

“What exactly did I do.” He asked.

 

After making up another fib the two tried their hardest to be quiet. But the dream was still fresh on Jack’s mind and Alex was the only thing Jack could think about the whole time and she had no fucking clue why.

 

…

 

A party could take Jack’s mind off of things easy enough, loud music, friends, Brian, and, most importantly, alcohol.

 

The only problem was that Jack’s dream was still on her mind. And she was scared that when she sees Alex on Monday that she will sense something is up. But that’s where the alcohol came in to forget things.

 

Which is where doing shots with Emma and Ashley came in. They were outside by the pool where not many people were. It was already dark but it was still summer so it was warm out.

 

After downing another shot Jack sat on a Brian’s lap on a poolside chair, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him. She was a little tipsy so it wasn’t exactly PG. He kissed her back just as passionately, running his fingers against the skin stretched across her hipbone.

 

“Hey guys!” Valerie called. “Want to come in the hot tub?”

 

They pulled away and shrugged, Jack hopping off of Brian’s lap. Everyone was stripped down to their underwear so Jack and Brian followed in suit. Jack sat in between Brian and Emma. Ashley, Lynn, Stephen, Valerie, and Valerie’s boyfriend Beau sat in it too. It was a big hot tub so one or two people could fit if they tried.

 

Speaking of, the door opened and Jack saw some people walk out; one of which was Alex. Fantastic.

 

Beau waved his hand. “Rian! Zack!” he called. “Hop in!”

 

Two of the guys – Rian and Zack – nodded and said something to Alex. She grinned and nodded, following behind Rian and Zack.

 

“Hey, guys.” The guy Jack recognised as Rian said. “You know the new girl, Alex yet?” he asked, pointing to Alex.

 

“Nah, nice to meet ya.” Beau said. “Guys, scoot over to make room.”

 

‘Scooting over’ lead to Jack in between Brian’s legs (which wasn’t a problem at all) as well as Valerie in between Beau’s, making a comfortable amount of room for Rian, Zack, and Alex.

 

“Any of you have a hair tie?” Alex asked. She was met with shaking heads and she sighed. “Thanks anyway.” And she started to strip down so she could get into the hot tub. Jack did her best not to stare, deciding to distract herself by running her finger along Brian’s leg.

 

As Alex sat in the hot tub Jack noticed the ripples going through the water. Jack subtly glanced up and she saw Alex’s hair floating in the water.

 

“Jesus, how do you handle so much hair?” Emma asked.

 

“It’s one step closer to becoming a mermaid.” Alex joked.

 

They fell into a new conversation, nothing in particular. Somewhere along the line Homecoming was brought up.

 

“It’s going to be fun.” Valerie grinned.

 

“Maybe if you have a date.” Stephen said jokingly.

 

“Speaking of,” Ashley began, turning her attention towards Emma. “Is Cutforth going to ask you out this time.”

 

Emma’s cheeks tinted pink. “I hope so.” She said with a smile.

 

“Just ask him yourself.” Alex said. “Guys are idiots anyway.”

 

“Hey!” all the guys said in near perfect unison.

 

Jack chuckled. “I love you babe, but you are an idiot.” She said while patting his cheek.

 

“But yeah, if you like this guy just ask him.” Alex continued.

 

“Well, if you need a date to Homecoming I’m sure there’s plenty of guy that would want to go with you.” Stephen said.

 

Alex let out a small chuckle. “Shame I’m a lesbian then.”

 

Lynn and Ashley laughed at Stephen awkward expression. “Well, there goes your foot.” Ashley said and turned to Alex. “I’m bi, and Lynn there is gay.” She nodded towards Lynn.

 

“Oh that’s cool.” Alex said. “But anyway, thanks for the consideration but I’m not sure if I’ll go. I’m more of an introvert so dances aren’t really my thing.”

 

Stephen shrugged. “You’re call.” And the conversation changed from there.

 

So the girl Jack had a sex dream about is a lesbian. Fucking fantastic.

 

…

 

If there was one thing Jack had learnt about Alex it’s that she liked being in her own world. Whenever she got to French she always had her earphones in and was reading whatever book she had that day. Jack didn’t mind; she could focus on texting Brian, her boyfriend who she loved and not the girl she had another sex dream about.

 

Alex greeted her with a smile, one Jack didn’t return and went right to her phone. She felt Alex watching her and when she glanced at her Alex quickly went back to her book. Jack felt a little guilty for giving the other girl the cold shoulder but she didn’t need whatever she was feeling towards Alex to escalate. It was the last thing she needed.

 

When the class began Mr. Franceschi handed out their grades for their last test. When Jack saw the red D she sighed. She glanced at Alex and saw she had an A. Jack recalled her telling her she was good at French.

 

“Nice job.” Jack commented. “Better than me,”

 

Alex shrugged. “Guess I’m just good at French.” She said. “If you need help I could tutor you.” She offered.

 

“Are you sure?” Jack didn’t really trust herself alone with Alex.

 

The girl nodded. “Yeah, if you’d like,”

 

Jack really couldn’t fail French and tutoring would actually be a big help. There wouldn’t be a problem if she didn’t have that damn dream.

 

Despite all the nervous thoughts running through her mind, she nodded. “Yeah, that’ll really help.”

 

“Great.” Alex grinned. “You can come over to my house tonight if you’d like.”

 

Jack nodded again. “Okay, cool.” She could handle being in a room alone with Alex, right?

 

…

  
After school Jack met Alex outside so she could drive her to her house. They didn’t make conversation, instead letting 5 Seconds of Summer play.

 

“To think people say girls only like them for their looks.” Jack decided to joke when the silence got too awkward.

 

Alex shrugged. “They’re okay looking I guess.” She said. “Great music though.”

 

“I like them and people always accuse me of only liking them for their looks.” Jack shrugged. Brian liked them too and that had seen them live recently. It was one of the loves they shared.

 

They fell into silence again. Jack wondered if making a joke about Alex being a lesbian had offended her. She didn’t mean to if she did.

 

“I didn’t mean to upset you.” Jack said awkwardly.

 

Alex glanced at her. “What do you mean?”

 

“The uh… lesbian joke.”

 

Alex smiled and shook her head. “It’s fine. I don’t care.”

 

Jack felt her body relax. “Okay, good.”

 

They pulled up to Alex’s house, definitely one of the nicer houses in the area. Jack followed her inside and upstairs to where she presumed to be her bedroom.

 

People always said you tell a lot about a person by what’s in their room. The first thing to catch Jack’s eye were the huge bookcases lining one side of the room. There were multiple posters of bands on her wall, including the smaller ones you rip of from magazines.

 

“So we can study on my bed.” Alex said, walking to the double bed. Jack followed her, setting down beside Alex.

 

“I’m pretty good at French oral, so how about I speak the phrases and you figure out what they mean?”

 

Jack nodded, fighting the blush at the words ‘French oral’. She did not need her mind to be in the gutter right now.

 

“Ready?” Jack nodded. _“Je vous en prie._ What does the mean?”

 

Jack bit her lip, searching her brain. “’Your welcome’ I think.”

 

Alex nodded. “Yep. Okay, another one. _Pouvez-vous m'aider_.”

 

Jack searched her brain but she shook her head. “I don’t know.” She groaned.

 

“It means ‘can you help me.’” Alex said. “You’ll get it soon. Wanna try another.”

 

Jack nodded and they tried a few more phrases, Jack not even getting half of them.

 

“Can we take a break?” Jack asked, lying down on her back.

 

“We’ve only been at this for a half hour.”

 

“Well that’s the longest I’ve studied without a break, so I think we deserve one.”

 

Alex smiled at the girl, rolling her eyes. “Fair enough.” She said. “You hungry?”

 

“Nah.” Jack said, and rolled onto her side looking at all the books. “That’s a lot of books by the way.”

 

“Yeah and I keep on getting more.” Alex laughed. “I haven’t read a lot of them anyway.”

 

Jack stood up and scanned the bookshelves. Jack wasn’t much of a book person so she didn’t recognise most of the books. Her eyes stopped on one hardback book. ‘You’re Just A Daydream Away’ was written in cursive across the spine. She pulled out the book and read the blurb.

 

_‘Kylie lives a normal life. She has her friends, a boyfriend, and she’s a cheerleader and is up to be head cheerleader. But what happens when a girl who favoured ripped jeans and leather jackets turns her life around?’_

“Dude, that’s my favourite book.” Alex commented with a grin.

 

“Lesbian love story I guess.” Jack laughed.

 

“Hey, you guys get enough in all media so let me have my lesbian literature.”

 

Jack figured ‘you guys’ meant straight people, which was fair. There were endless love stories of a boy and a girl falling in love, not many of two girls.

 

“It sounds interesting.” Jack decided.

 

“You can borrow it if you’d like.” Alex offered.

 

“Nah, I’m not much of a reader.” Jack shrugged.

 

“Gotta start somewhere.” Alex said. “Give it a shot. You might like it.”

 

Jack stared at the hardback in her hands. She technically did have the time for it since her parents didn’t let her stay out after dark on school nights. And since fall was approaching and it got dark earlier she would have a lot of time.

 

“You know what, I think I will.” Jack decided.

 

…

 

Jack decided to dive right into the book when she got home. She settled on her bed and was surprised by how engrossed she was in it. From what she understood the book was about a girl named Kylie who develops feelings for another girl named Jen but she had always thought she was straight.

 

When she was a-hundred pages in she glanced at the time and saw it was almost eleven. She got home around six and realised she’d only been reading. She ignored the fact that she was reading pretty slowly for her liking. Maybe she could read a few more chapters before she went to bed. At least she thought until she heard her phone’s text tone go off.

 

_From Bri: Hey you still awake?_

Jack bit her lip. Sure, she wanted to talk to Brian but she was really into this book. She decided to text him back.

 

_To Bri: Yeah, I’ve been reading_

_From Bri: You’ve been reading?_

_To Bri: Yeah. What’re you trying to imply?_

_From Bri: You never read. That’s all_

_To Bri: Well Alex leant me a book and I’m really into it_

_From Bri: Speaking of, how did studying go?_

_To Bri: Could’ve been better I guess. I already suck at French anyway but I guess Alex tutoring will help since she’s really good._

_From Bri: Well I leave you to get back to reading_

_To Bri: I didn’t say I didn’t want to talk :(_

_From Bri: Yeah, but talking will keep both of us up anyway. And I’m exhausted._

_To Bri: Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow_

_From Bri: You too :)_

Jack went back to reading, because she was so damn intrigued to see what would happen to Kylie and Jen.

 

…

 

“Holy shit is that a book?” Lynn asked when Jack stepped into her car. Jack accidently read to two in the morning but she couldn’t put the book down. She was almost finished so she was hoping to finish the book that night.

 

“Yeah, Alex leant it to me and I got really into it.” Jack explained.

 

“You don’t even do required reading for English. You always just read sparknotes.”

 

“Well this book is a hell lot more interesting than fucking Of Mice and Men.” Jack said. “Which by the way has the most bullshit ending.”

 

“You just don’t get it.” Lynn defended.

 

“No, I get it. But I can still think it’s bullshit.”

 

“So why did Alex lend you a book anyway?” Lynn asked, changing the subject.

 

“She was tutoring me in French and she has a lot of books. I saw this one and it’s her favourite so she leant it to me.”

 

“Ooh la, la.” Lynn joked.

 

“What?” Jack asked, raising a brow.

 

“Well, she leant you her favourite book.”

 

“And?”

 

“It takes a lot to lend a favourite book. It’s like recommending you favourite movie or band; you want that person to love it too. Alex sounds like that type where she’s hoping you love it.”

 

“I actually really like it so far.” Jack said.

 

“Well then it works out.”

 

Jack nodded in response. Jack recalled Alex being so insistent on her reading the book (along with a list of instructions of things not to do with her book which included dog earring and eating near it). Maybe it was a thing she always did. Maybe she got Ariel and Chrissy to read it too.

 

Or maybe she knows… No. How could she? It’s not like she likes her, it was just a few dreams.

 

“Ready for Homecoming?” Lynn asked.

 

“Oh yeah, I am.” Jack nodded. “You going with anyone?”

 

“Nah.” Lynn shook her head. “Queer girls lack at this school. Me and Ashley are probably going alone with Stephen and Josh.”

 

“Groups are always a good back up.”

 

“Well, you and Val have your boy-things so we kind of need it.”

 

“Speaking of boy-things, has Cutforth asked Emma yet?” Jack asked, remembering the conversation in the hot tub.

 

“Nope, but Emma told me they’ve been talking. She said she might take Alex’s advice and ask him herself.”

 

“Smart.” Jack nodded. “They’ve liked each other for ages anyway.”

 

They pulled up to their high school and did the usual greetings of hugs. Emma had a grin on her face.

 

“Guess who I’m going to Homecoming with?”

 

“Cutforth finally asked you?” Valerie smirked.

 

“No, I asked him.” Emma said. “And he said he’s wanted to ask me out for months but thought I didn’t like him so he didn’t bother.” She explained.

 

“Well that’s great.” Jack smiled. She spotted Brian waiting by her locker as usual and after a quick good bye to her friends she jogged over to him.

 

“Hey.” She said and pecked his lips.

 

“Hey, how’s the book?” He asked.

 

“Great, I’m almost finished.” Jack grinned.

 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you excited about a book before.” He laughed.

 

“I guess Alex is having an effect on me.” Jack joked.

 

“You two becoming good friends?” Brian asked.

 

Jack shrugged. “I guess. I just hope her tutoring helps.”

 

Brian nodded. “Yeah, you do suck at French.”

 

She playfully punched his shoulder. “Fuck off.”

 

The first bell went and after a quick good bye Jack got her things and made her way to class. She was one of the first there and she sat in her usual spot. Alex hadn’t arrived yet so she decided to read while she waited.

 

_‘My heart was racing. I never thought a girl could have this much of an effect on me. Jen was making my heart race in a way Sam was never able to do. I’d never wanted to kiss anyone so badly before. So without thinking I closed the gap to press out lips together. She seemed shocked at first but she kissed me back, her hands slipping into my jean’s back pockets. Her lips were so softer than Sam’s. Sam my boyfriend… Sam I loved. Sam whose furious voice is what broke me and Jen apart-‘_

“Damn, talk about reversed roles.” Alex voice broke Jack’s concentration. “How far you in?” She laughed sitting down.

 

Jack blushed. “Sam just caught them kissing.”

 

“You’re already that far? That’s fast for someone who doesn’t really read.”

 

“It’s really good.” Jack said.

 

“Good to hear since it’s my favourite.” Alex grinned. Jack couldn’t help but think about what Lynn said that morning.

 

“I’ll try to have it back to you tomorrow.” Jack said.

 

“Great.” She grinned.

 

Jack’s mind went back to the book, how Kylie enjoyed the kiss. Her eyes went to Alex’s lips and she couldn’t help but wonder what it was like to kiss them. They looked really soft under the touch of lip-gloss Alex was wearing. Jack looked away before she noticed her staring.

 

“So still not going to Homecoming?” Jack asked.

 

Alex shook her head. “Like I said it’s not my thing.”

 

“You sure?”

 

“Yeah. Ariel and Chrissy have already tried enough. I don’t like dances anyway.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

…

 

Homecoming rolled around and the dance committee had done well at setting up the gym. The theme was 1920s so that meant flapper costumes on the girls’ part and old jazz music. No alcohol like there would be at a speak easy though, that was left on the after party.

 

Dancing with Emma and Valerie was fun though, trying to replicate dances almost a-hundred years old. They were definitely shit but it was a lot of fun either way.

 

Jack broke away from the group to get a drink and she walked over to where the beverages were. She picked up a can of coke and started to down it.

 

“Well hello there, pretty lady.” A familiar voice said. Jack smiled at the sound of the voice and turned to Brian. He was wearing chinos, a button up shirt, suspenders, and topped off with a newsy cap.

 

“Would it be too much to ask you for a dance.”

 

“Wow, a gentleman and hot; score.” Jack said, laughing at her boyfriend’s antics. She drank the rest of her coke, took his out stretched hand and he pulled her back to the dance floor.

 

They danced together, not even trying to keep up with any dance style. It was a lot of fun though and the couple was dying of laughter.

 

Unfortunately, like any school dance it ended ridiculously early. As people started to file out of the gym, Jack stayed by Brian’s side with Josh, Emma, Emma’s date Luke Cutforth, and Stephen walking with them to Stephen’s car. Valerie, Lynn, and Ashley had come in a different car since it was hard enough fitting the six of them. The result was Jack sitting in Brian’s lap in the passenger seat but an excuse for Emma to sit in Luke’s lap since Stephen had a sports car and it didn’t have a middle seat.

 

They drove to the after party, which was being held at Zack Merrick’s house. Jack’s mind immediately jumped to wondering if Alex was there since she seemed to be friends with him. She ignored the hope bubbling in her chest, instead snuggling deeper into Brian as they drove. She imagined Brian smiling as he tightened his grip on Jack.

 

Jack’s mind went to the ending of You’re Just a Daydream Away. She’d finished much quicker than she thought she would and she could see why Alex liked it so much. It ended happy with Kylie and Jen together with Kylie coming to terms with her bisexuality as well as support from people around her. It wasn’t the unrealistic type of support since the parents were written pretty well and the characters you’d expect to be antagonised were actually pretty awesome. Even Sam was shown sympathy. That made Jack consider her own life, what would happen if she went further with Alex? She couldn’t hurt Brian like that, she never could. He didn’t deserve that but she couldn’t deny her thoughts about Alex were becoming voluntary and she felt awful about that.

 

When they got to Zack’s house Brian piggybacked her inside, Jack giggling the whole way and blushing when her skirt rode up.

 

“Put me down, psycho!” she squealed.

 

“You’re too pretty to walk though.” He said, not putting her down.

 

Jack rolled her eyes but still snuggled into Brian’s shoulder, smiling.

 

“Hey, lover boy!” A guy Jack recognised as Oli called to Brian. “Want to come play beer pong?”

 

“You okay with that?” Brian asked Jack, before setting her down.

 

She shrugged. “Sure, I can be your cheerleader.” She joked.

 

She walked with Brian to where beer pong was set up. It was decided it’d be three on three; Rian, Zack, and a guy named Tony against Brian, Oli, and Oli’s friend Jordan. Jack stood on the sidelines, watching the guys play. She wasn’t that into beer pong so she was bored watching it. She scanned the room to see if she knew anyone she could talk to and her eyes stopped when she saw Alex in the corner, phone in her hand. She should’ve stayed and watched but it was as if she was on autopilot and she walked towards the girl.

 

“Hey stranger.” She said, Alex jumping in surprise.

 

“Hey.” She said, smiling at Jack. “Nice dress.”

 

“Thanks.” Jack smiled. “You missed quite a Homecoming.”

 

Alex shrugged. “Whatever. I’m only here because Zack was ready to carry me out the door and stop reading. Jokes on him is that I have the Kindle app on my phone so nothing’s stopping me from reading.”

 

“You’re a rebel, I like that.” Jack smiled.

 

“Yeah, I read instead of socialise.” Alex joked. “How’s that boyfriend of yours going, anyway?”

 

“Right now he’s playing beer pong so hopefully the night doesn’t end with me having a _drunk_ boyfriend.”

 

“You like him a lot, don’t you?” Alex smiled.

 

Jack blushed, ignoring that she had doubts because of the girl in front of her. “Yeah, I love him.” She said.

 

“Lucky you, I’m single and lonely.”

 

“I’m sure a girl would love to date you.” Jack smiled. _Like me._

_No._ Not _like me_. She told herself.

 

“So I really liked You’re Just a Daydream Away.” Jack said.

 

Alex grinned. “I love it so much.”

 

“I can see why.” Jack said. “It was pretty great.” She couldn’t help but smile at remembering the last chapter. It was when Kylie chose Jen, and they had the best kissing scene Jack had ever read.

 

“I need it to be a movie. But like an indie film. I’m willing to fund it.”

 

Jack nodded. “Yeah, it would actually be a great indie film.”

 

“Well if it ever gets turned into one we should see it together, deal?”

 

Jack nodded. “Deal.”

 

They talked for a little more, mostly about the book they now share a love for. There was a sparkle in Alex’s eyes Jack found herself loving.

 

She was so fucked.

 

…

 

Girls’ night was probably one of Jack’s favourite nights. Spending time watching movies and pigging out with her friends was always fun. Jack was in a laughing fit as she watched Lynn and Ashley sing along to Anaconda, focussing mostly on the sampled part.

 

“MY ANACONDA DON’T! MY ANACONDA DON’T! MY ANADONCA DON’T WANT NONE UNLESS YOU’VE GOT BUNS HUN!” The two girls sang in between a fit of their own laughter, as well as attempting to rap with Nikki Minaj.

 

Jack tried to concentrate on having fun with her friends but her mind kept going back to Alex and how that girl made her feel. It’s gone past a sexual nature and onto a more emotional one. They just… clicked. And clicked really well. And there was something about the ways Alex would smile at her, the way her eyes looked when she did. Jack could stare into them forever.

 

“What’s on your mind?” Emma’s voice interrupted her thoughts.

 

Jack glanced at her. “Nothing.” She lied.

 

“Really? You seemed really deep in thought; something wrong?”

 

Jack shook her head. “Nah, I’m fine.” She said.

 

“Hey, how about we play one of those dance games?” Valerie interrupted. “I can set out the mats.”

 

“I can’t dance though.” Emma complained.

 

“Who cares, it’ll be fun.” Lynn said, already grinning at the idea.

 

While Valerie set up the game Emma turned back to Jack. “Seriously, what’s wrong?”

 

Jack shook her head. “Nothing’s wrong, I swear.”

 

How could she tell her she might have feelings for someone else? The girl part was bad enough but she was with Brian. She _couldn’t_ like someone else.

 

Jack avoided the conversation by playing the game with Lynn. They danced to the classic Girlfriend from Avril Lavigne. The dance moves were ridiculously complicated and Jack had a hard time keeping up, although she couldn’t deny it was a lot of fun.

 

After a few more rounds they all surrendered on the couch.

 

“So how are you a Cutforth going?” Lynn asked.

 

Emma smiled. “He’s… great. I really like him.” She replied as her cheeks tinted pink.

 

“Well that’s disgustingly adorable.” Jack said, smiling at her friend.

 

“Speaking of disgustingly adorable, how are you a Dales going?” Ashley asked.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I don’t know, you guys seem to be spending less time together.” Ashley explained.

 

“Oh, uh no we’re fine. I’ve just been studying.”

 

“Studying?” Valerie asked raising a brow. “Since when do you study outside of exam season?”

 

“Since it’s helped me improve my French.”

 

“It’s just that you two are usually joint at the hip. And while it’s like that when you’re together, it seems like lately you two are being distant.”

 

Jack bit her lip, she’d hoped they hadn’t noticed the lack of lap sitting or kissing in the hallway. She even started going to her first class quicker so she could see Alex. She didn’t want to grow distant from Brian but something was pulling her towards Alex. And she hated it.

 

“I guess we’re just down from the high.” Jack shrugged. Which in a way was true but coming down from a high didn’t have to lead to growing apart.

 

“You’re lying, tell us the truth.” Emma said.

 

“Who says I’m lying?” Jack asked, crossing her arms.

 

“Oh please, I’ve known you long enough to be able to tell.” Emma said.

 

“I agree, you’re hiding something.” Lynn said. Lynn would definitely know best being Jack’s best friend.

 

Jack sighed, rubbing her eyes. “I think… I think I have feelings for someone else.” She admitted.

 

“Oh…” Emma said. “Well shit.”

 

“Are you sure?” Lynn asked.

 

Jack nodded. “I mean, it’s not like how I feel about Brian. I love him to death. But I just click with them a lot more.” She explained.

 

“So like you’re more infatuated with Brian but like this other guy in a more real sort of way?” Valerie suggested.

 

“I didn’t say that!” Jack argued, although the thought had crossed her mind. She felt strongly for Brian and it was intense but what she felt with Alex felt more… natural. She didn’t know how to explain it.

 

“You gonna tell us who it is?” Ashley asked.

 

Jack shook her head. “No way.”

 

“Why?”

 

 _Because I can’t tell you I might possibly but more than likely am bi yet. “_ Because I don’t need your meddling.” She said.

 

“Okay but by the look of it we’re gonna find out sooner or later.” Emma said.

 

And if she were being honest, Jack couldn’t deny that truth.

 

…

 

Jack’s French had improved immensely, earning a B+ on her last test much to her pleasure. Alex still insisted on tutoring her to until she at least got an A. Jack didn’t mind, it was a great excuse to hang out with her. Sure, maybe it was best to avoid her but she couldn’t help herself.

 

However, somewhere along the line they had stopped studying and were lying on Alex’s bed simply talking.

 

“I saw Blink when I was twelve. The good old days.” Jack explained. “My brother took me and that’s when I fell in love with them. Always loved their more fun songs over the sadder songs, although I do like sad songs.”

 

“That sounds like so much fun.” Alex smiled. “None of my friends at my old school were into them so I went to see them alone when I was sixteen. Snuck out and everything, one of the best nights of my life. I was even called up on stage and I got to sing.”

 

“You sing?” Jack asked.

 

Alex nodded. “Sometimes, I’m okay.”

 

“Can I hear you?” Jack asked.

 

Alex blushed. “Uh, I don’t know.” She said, looking away from Jack.

 

“Come on, I’m sure you’re really good.”

 

“Well what should I sing?” She asked.

 

“How about some good ole’ Taylor Swift?” One thing they had learnt about each other was they both loved her.

 

“Okay, what’s your favourite?” Alex asked and sat up.

 

“All You Had to Do Was Stay.” She said,

 

Alex smiled, cleared her throat and began to sing.

 

_“People like you always want back the love they gave away, And people like me wanna believe you when you say you've changed, The more I think about it now the less I know, All I know is that you drove us off the road’_

Jack stared at the other girl in awe. She was… amazing. She had a soft voice but it was really nice.

 

_‘Stay, Hey, all you had to do was stay Had me in the palm of your hand, Then why'd you have to go and lock me out when I let you in, Stay, hey, now you say you want it, Back now that it's just too late, Well, it could've been easy, All you had to do was stay’_

Jack’s mouth fell agape. She hadn’t expected Alex to be so amazing. Alex looked down at her. “That bad?”

 

Jack shook her head. “No… you were really good.” She said, still a little flustered.

 

Alex smiled and went to lay back down next to Jack. “Thanks.” She said.

 

Jack eyes fell to her lips. They looked unbelievably soft and she wanted more than anything to press her lips to them. To know what her dreams felt like in real life.

 

“What’s up?” Alex asked, sending Jack a curious look.

 

“Nothing.” Jack said.

 

“So… how did you and Brian start dating?”

 

Brian, that’s right. Her boyfriend she loved dearly. That topic was a good distraction.

 

Jack talked about the freshman crush and the looks from afar that held on until the end of their sophomore year of hooking up at a party. Not the most romantic story but it worked for them.

 

“That sounds nice.” Alex said.

 

“You ever have a boyfriend? I mean, before realising you’re gay?” Jack asked.

 

“Nah, I never dated because there weren’t any guys I liked. And here we are now with lesbian me.” She joked.

 

“How did you know?” Jack asked.

 

“Oh… uh I don’t know, a lot of thinking and a lot of denying. You can only watch so much lesbian porn, as well as preferring it, before you can continue thinking you’re straight.” Alex said with a chuckle. “But yeah, I figured it out and everything turned out fine.”

 

“That’s good to hear.” Jack mumbled in reply.

 

“Mhm.” Alex said. “Don’t you need to go home soon?”

 

Jack looked at the time. Shit, she did actually. “Yeah, I do need to go.”

 

They went down to Alex’s car since Jack lived too far to walk. They barely exchanged words in the car, letting Green Day fill the silence. Talking about Brian didn’t seize the desire to kiss Alex at all. And she felt so guilty for that; guilty she’d think of being with anyone that wasn’t her boyfriend.

 

“Thanks for all the help with tutoring.” Jack said when Alex pulled up to her house.

 

Alex sent her a smile. “It’s no problem.”

 

Jack nodded. “I think I don’t need the tutoring anymore.” She said.

 

Alex’s face fell. “Oh, are you sure?”

 

Jack nodded. “Yeah, but thanks for all the help. I’ll definitely do a lot better this year because of it.”

 

Alex nodded and Jack stepped out of the car. She quickly went inside her house and closed the font door behind her. She looked through the window, seeing Alex’s car drive off.

 

She regretted what she said but she didn’t trust herself around Alex anymore. At this rate she was bound to do something she’d regret.

 

“You okay?” Joe’s voice pipped in.

 

Jack glanced at her brother and nodded. “Yeah.”

 

“Did Brian do something? Because if he did I swear to god I’ll kick his ass for you.”

 

Jack smiled at her bother’s over protectiveness. “No, Brian hasn’t done anything. Don’t worry, I’m fine,”

 

Well she was half telling the truth.

 

…

 

“What you thinking about?” Brian asked, running his fingers through Jack’s short black hair as she laid in his lap.

 

“Nothing.” Jack said.

 

In reality, she kept thinking about what she said to Alex, as well as the regret of it. She was scared, she didn’t want to feel about Alex how she did. She couldn’t. She kept telling herself that she loved Brian but that was starting to feel like a lie. Maybe Valerie was right when she said she was probably only infatuated with Brian. But it felt too real to be only infatuation, at least when she felt it. She wasn’t sure anymore and she felt awful. She felt awful about a lot of things. Brian loved her and here she was possibly having feelings for someone else.

 

“You’ve seemed distracted lately.” He said. “We haven’t spent as much time together.”

 

“Guess I’ve been busy studying.” And reading. That was something different she hadn’t told anyone. She could handle playful teasing but it was a love she’d acquired because of Alex and that made it feel personal. But she’d been trying to spend more time with Brian instead of Alex. She hadn’t completely realised she’d been distancing herself from Brian. She didn’t want to but there was something about Alex that drew her in to her. Whatever she felt was way more intense that a crush, especially compared to the crush she had on Brian before they started dating. In a way it wasn’t that different. Alex was just different but she wasn’t sure how.

 

Jack leaned up to kiss Brian as her best attempt to get Alex off of her mind. But the thing was Brian didn’t smell like Alex. She was used to his taste and the feeling of his lips but her mind couldn’t help but wonder to Alex’s lips. How they probably tasted with the lip-gloss she always wore, to run her fingers through Alex’s hair.

 

She pressed her lips harder against Brian’s, slipping her tongue between his lips. She loved her boyfriend. She did. Alex wasn’t anything to her, so just ignore it, this felt good; it felt great. She wasn’t a lesbian; she knew that for sure. Having feelings for Alex didn’t make her bisexual.

 

She felt Brian’s hand on her thigh, gently rubbing it. Jack let out the smallest moan as Brian moved to her neck. She would usually push him away when he did that, not wanting to get hickies. Maybe she just wanted a constant reminder for the next few days. She was already feeling guilty enough for still thinking about Alex at the least appropriate times. The distancing idea wasn’t working like she thought it would. She missed Alex a lot, which surprised her. She only saw her in French now and she was able to distract herself with Brian in Math. Alex had Ariel and Chrissy to hand out with anyway so she probably didn’t notice. It was more difficult in French since Alex would always try to make conversation, which was fair. They mostly kept their conversations on books. With Jack’s need found love for books the only person she could talk about them with was Alex. Emma liked to read but she never talked about them. It was also the fact she really _liked_ talking about books with Alex.

 

Jack felt Brian’s hand go a little higher, slowly going under her skirt. Jack let him, focussing on how it felt as he ran his fingers on her skin. It sent tingles down her spine and she loved it. She was with Brian, despite everything having to do with Alex.

 

…

 

“You going to Zack’s Halloween party?” Alex asked when Jack got to French.

 

“Yeah.” Alex shrugged. “Me and Bri are dressing up as Jack and Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas.”

 

“Cute.” Alex said. “I’m going as Harley Quinn.”

 

“That’ll look cool.” Jack replied.

 

Alex nodded. “I love Halloween so I’m excited.” She said.

 

“Even with the introvertness?” Jack asked.

 

Alex nodded. “Halloween’s an exception.” She said.

 

“Well I think you’ll look awesome in your costume.” Alex said with a smile.

 

“And I’m sure you’ll make a lovely Sally.”

 

“Shame I couldn’t convince Brian to be Sally.” Jack joked. She couldn’t help but think about how cool it’d be if she was Jack and Alex was her Sally. She pushed the thought from her mind though.

 

They fell into a small silence, neither sure what to say. The guilt of Jack pushing Alex away came back. She really did regret it, mostly because her feelings for Alex were becoming so intense. Why did she think pushing her away would do anything? If anything she thought about her more. But breaking up with Brian and dating Alex just wasn’t an option. It would _never_ be an option.

 

“Can I ask you something?” Alex asked, breaking their silence.

 

Jack looked back at her and nodded. “Sure.”

 

“What’s up?” she asked. “You’ve been distant lately. I thought we were friends but it feels like you’ve been pushing me away.”

 

Jack bit her lip. Of course she had noticed. She just didn’t think she would hurt her in the process.

 

“Sorry.” Jack said. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

 

“Is something wrong?” Alex asked.

 

Jack shook her head. “No. I’ve just wanted to spend more time with Brian, that’s all.”

 

“And that includes ignoring me?”

 

“I haven’t been ignoring you!” Jack argued.

 

“What about math? You usually always said hi but you seem to purposely look away.”

 

Now that was something that was true. She had hoped she would just think she was focussed on Brian. But she would really just watch the door subtly, waiting for Alex to arrive only to focus on Brian the second Alex came into sight.

 

“Can you please tell me what’s up? Seriously, did I do something wrong?”

 

Jack shook her head. “It’s not you.” She said. “I swear. I’m just going through something right now.” _Like I’m most definitely bisexual and I want to kiss you really badly._

“Okay… but if you need someone to talk to you can to me.”

 

Jack smiled at her. “Thanks.”

 

…

 

The Halloween party arrived and everyone was dressed up. When they got to Zack’s house they could hear the music from down the street and see all the houses parked outside of it. As expected everyone was dressed up and it was difficult to move through the house. The Halloween parties were always the biggest, most of their school’s upperclassmen attending.

 

Not unlike the last party, Jack was left watching Brian play beer pong. Even though she wasn’t too big on it she would still rather be playing than watching.

 

“How about you let some of the girls play next!” A girl named Tay called.

 

“Yeah, it’s always the guys.” Agreed her friend Laura.

 

“Fine, we’ll finish this game and if you can make two teams then go for it.” Zack said and threw the beer pong wall, which landed neatly into the cup. Brian picked up the drink and Jack watched him drink it.  


“Hey Barakat.” Jack heard along with a tapping on the shoulder. “You want to play? It’s one team.”

 

Jack smiled and nodded. “I feel like Tay read my mind.”

 

“Good.” Laura smiled. “Ariel and Chrissy are getting Costello so we’re good.”

 

Jack smiled back and went back to pay attention to the game, or more so waiting for it to finish. She saw Ariel and Chrissy come up with their black and red haired friend, Ash with Alex in tow. She was wearing the Harley Quinn outfit; one that exposed her stomach and tights under a tiny, tiny skirt. Jack gulped, thinking about what it would be like to pull the tights down a feel her exposed skin. It looked so soft, something that would drive Jack crazy. She looked away quickly so she wouldn’t catch her starting.

 

“Okay girls! You’re up!” Zack’s voice ran through her thoughts.

 

Jack followed Tay and Laura to one end of the table while Ash, Ariel, and Chrissy went to the other. Jack focussed on the game but Alex was standing in a position where it wouldn’t be obvious she was staring at her. And she couldn’t take her eyes off of her. Alex herself seemed to have gotten bored of the beer pong because she started fiddling with her phone, probably reading. How did that girl read so much?

 

“You’re up Jack.” Came Laura’s voice. Jack broke her trance on Alex and picked up the ping-pong ball, tossing it only for it to miss its target.

 

“Nice try.” Ariel smirked, then tossed her ball only to miss its target.

 

“And that’s why you shouldn’t get cocky.” Laura teased.

 

The game continued, Jack going through a few drinks. She was a self-admitted lightweight so maybe it was a little reckless to be playing this game. She already lost any sense of aim, missing the cups by more than a few metres.

 

“Do you need to sit down, Jack?” Laura asked, concern in her voice.

 

Jack shook her head. “I’m fine.” She said.

 

“She’s just a light weight.” Ash teased.

 

Jack ignored the comment. She scanned the crowd to see if Brian was there. As far as she could tell he wasn’t there. He didn’t have to stay and watch, she’s left in the past when she got bored but it still annoyed her.

 

“Maybe I can take her out to get some air.” The voice of an angel came in.

 

“You sure, Lex?” Chrissy asked.

 

“It’s fine, I deal with her in French. Plus, the last thing Zack needs is for her to puke on his carpet.” Alex continued. She walked closer to Jack and took her arm gently. “C’mon.” she smiled and Jack nodded, letting the girl walk her to the back door.

 

“Better to puke on the concrete than the carpet.” Alex said and Jack nodded. It was a little cold outside, fall making its way in. Jack took a breath, enjoy the feeling of the cold air entering her lungs.

 

“So where’s the Jack to your Sally?” Alex asked.

 

“Uh, I don’t know.” Jack said. “He’s off somewhere.” She concluded.

 

“Mhm.” Alex nodded. “How’ve you been going in French?” she asked.

 

“I got an A- on the last test.” Jack smiled.

 

Alex grinned. “That’s great! Good to know my tutoring helped.”

 

“Well you are very good at it.” She replied and noticed how pretty Alex looked in the moonlight. Her brown eyes shone as she looked at Jack. That was when Jack found herself stepping forward with every intention to close the gap between them. That was until Alex put her hands on Jack’s shoulders, not to pull her in sooner but to stop her.

 

“What are you doing?” She asked.

 

Jack went wide-eyed, realising what she was just about to do. She was actually trying to kiss Alex! She didn’t want to do that. She didn’t need another thing to stress about.

 

“Look, you’re with Brian, remember? I don’t mess around with girls in relationships.” She said.

 

Jack shook her head, “S-sorry.” She stuttered. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

 

Alex frowned at her. “How about we find Brian?” she suggested, turning to walk to the doors.

 

Jack nodded before asking a question that was burning on her mind. “If I wasn’t with Brian, would’ve you stopped me?”

 

Alex glanced back at her. “No.”

 

…

 

“Are you okay?” came Emma’s voice, making Jack jump in surprise.  She looked at Emma as she set down her tray beside Jack.

 

Jack mustered up her best fake smile. “Yeah, I’m fine.” She said.

 

Emma gave Jack the look she always did when she didn’t believe Jack but she didn’t push any truth out of her. Instead she simply shrugged it off and ate her lunch.

 

“The Halloween party was _insane_.” Came Stephen’s voice, Brian in tow. When Brian sat down Jack didn’t make her usual move to sit in his lap. He even held out his arms, ready to hold her. Instead she stayed in her seat, not making a move. Stephen had started up a conversation with Josh while Emma, Ashley, Lynn, and Valerie had their own. They never paid attention to the couple so they didn’t notice the confused look Brian was sending Jack. Jack ignored it, pushing her food with her fork.

 

She had been so close to kissing Alex but her reasoning for pushing her away was fair. But after Alex admitted she would’ve let her kiss her the desire to kiss her intensified. She needed to feel Alex’s lips on hers. She needed to wrap her arms around her while feeling lightheaded from all the intense touches. She couldn’t do any of those things if she was still with Brian. She didn’t even consider herself to still be in love with him. How could she when all she wanted to do was kiss and hold Alex?

 

She felt a hand on her knee. “Is something wrong?” he whispered.

 

She moved her leg away from his hand, still avoiding his gaze.

 

“Jack, seriously what’s wrong?”

 

Jack could feel her eyes welling up as she took a deep breath. “I’m fine.” She chocked out.

 

“No you’re not, can you please tell me what’s wrong?” she felt his hand on her knee again, this time giving it a comforting squeeze.

 

She moved her knee again. “I just need space.” She snapped. Brian looked slightly taken aback at her aggression but nodded anyway. Jack felt slightly guilty; she didn’t mean to hurt him. But her feelings for Alex were stressing her out. Brian was like a safety net for her, she didn’t have to worry about being lonely if she had him. Being with Alex came with risks like rejection. She knew her family wouldn’t have a problem since one of her guy cousins had just gotten married to a dude and her parents were in full support of that. It was more of the rejection on a whole. She couldn’t handle that. Her friends would probably start to hate her if she broke up with Brian for Alex. It sounded so… _trashy_ , the idea of leaving a guy for a girl. There’d probably be a rumour she used Brian as a beared, completely invalidating everything she’d felt for him for over a year. She could imagine people whispering at her in the hallways when she was with Alex. But being with Brian was starting to feel like too much of a lie since she was harbouring such strong feelings for Alex.

 

“Sorry.” She mumbled. “I didn’t mean to sound bitchy.”

 

Brian frowned at her. “Do you want to talk after school?” he asked.

 

She nodded at this, already knowing how that conversation would end.

 

…

 

“Keep the door open!” Brian’s mom called when they got to Brian’s house.

 

“We know!” he called back as they walked to his room. Jack didn’t bother making herself comfortable; she just needed to get through this quickly, like ripping off a band-aid.

 

“So what’s wrong?” he asked, lying down on his bed by leaving enough space for Jack to curl up beside him.

 

She sighed. “Bri… I think we should break up.”

 

Her eyes welled up at the sight of heartbreak and disbelief in his eyes. “Wh-what do you mean? Don’t you love me?”

 

She went silent. She figured it was better than ‘no.’

 

“Why?” he asked, his voice breaking.

 

“I have feelings for someone else.” She admitted, wiping the tears running down her cheeks.

 

Brian was silent and sighed. “Is it Alex?” he whispered.

 

She figured she owed him to be honest. “Yeah.” She said.

 

“So you’re a lesbian?” he asked.

 

“Well, bi.” She clarified. “But I didn’t know until I met her. I swear to god I didn’t use you as a beard.”

 

Brian nodded. “I believe you, doesn’t make me feel any less shitty.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Jack said honestly.

 

“You can’t help who you fall for.” He said.

 

She nodded. “Well, at least I’ll always remember you as my first love.” She said in attempt to cheer him up.

 

“I was going for only.” He mumbled.

 

“I’m sure you’ll find another girl.” She assured. “We’re still friends, right?”

 

He nodded. “Sure. It’ll take me a while to get over you but I only want you to be happy.” He smiled at her and Jack felt her chest grow warm. How could she let someone so great go?

 

“You know if it helps, you were a great boyfriend.”

 

“And you were a pretty damn great girlfriend.”

 

…

 

The girls didn’t push for an explanation when she told them the next morning she and Brian broke up. They had probably seen it coming. It was strange to no longer see Brian waiting for her by her locker, greeting her with a kiss. But that was something she didn’t see herself missing too much after she makes things with Alex real.

 

Her plan for this was telling Alex she was having trouble in French again. Which was a lie but it was the only way she could think of to get her and Alex alone.

 

They kept their usual routine going to Alex’s house, music playing to fill any awkward silences.

 

“You know, I was so sure you got it.” Alex said on the ride.

 

“Never too bad to touch up, right?”

 

“I guess.”

 

When they got to Alex’s house they went straight upstairs and set their books on Alex’s bed.

 

“Before we start, let’s try something a little different.” Jack said.

 

Alex gave her a raised brow. “Like?”

 

“Well, I just want to make sure I’m saying this phrase correctly.” She explained.

 

“Uh, okay go.” She said.

 

Jack cleared her throat, ignoring her racing heart as she uttered the French words. “ _Je t'apprécie vraiment_.”

 

Alex raised a brow. “You appreciate me?”

 

Jack blushed. “Uh, that’s not what I meant.”

 

“Did you use Google translate?”

 

“…Maybe.” She answered bashfully.

 

“What’d you mean to say?”

 

“It doesn’t matter.” She muttered. “I wanted to try and be different and say it in French.” She muttered.

 

“Seems pretty important if you went out of your way to say it in French.” Alex said.

 

Jack stayed silent looking down at her hands, and Alex sighed. “I heard you and Brian broke up.” She said.

 

Jack looked back up at her. “Yeah, that happened.” She nodded.

 

“Did you break up with him?”

 

Jack nodded.

 

“...Does it have anything to do with what happened at the Halloween party?”

 

Jack shook her head. “No.”

 

“No?”

 

“No. Because what happened at the Halloween party had a lot of build up.” She admitted.

 

“…Oh.”

 

“You said if I wasn’t with Brian you would’ve kissed me.”

 

“Well I would’ve _let_ you kiss me at least.”

 

“And you’ve confused me since probably day one.”

 

Alex took a moment before she replied. “Funny that I thought you were really pretty since the moment I saw you.”

 

“So… what does this mean for us?” Jack asked.

 

“What do you want it to mean?” Alex asked. “What do you even identify as?”

 

“Bi. Now at least.”

 

“And do you want me to kiss you?”

 

“In a way I’ve wanted you to since the moment I saw you.”

 

Alex smiled and closed the gap between her and Jack. Jack smiled and wrapped her arms around Alex’s neck, kissing her back. Alex’s lips were like how Jack imagined them and better. They were soft and she could taste Alex’s lip-gloss – it was strawberry flavoured – and Alex gently stroked Jack’s cheekbone. It wasn’t completely chaste but not too passionate, a pretty damn good first kiss.

 

When they pulled away, Alex mumbled a question against Jack’s lips, lightly panting as she ran her fingers through Jack’s short hair. “So, what were you attempting to say in French? I’m curious.”

 

Jack smiled. “I really like you.” She said.

 

Alex grinned, showing off her perfect white teeth in the process. “Well, if it wasn’t already obvious, I really, really like you too.” And as if to prove her point, she kissed her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually love this one so much.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn’t actually planning to add more to this story but I needed to write this okay. This is what happens when you’re a lesbian but are Jalex trash.

 

Three months. Alex and Jack had been in a relationship for three whole months and they were great months. In that time Jack had come out as bi to her friends and family. All were accepting and she was able to avoid any anxiety with Alex that would come if she forced herself to keep their relationship a secret, especially when Brian knew.

 

Speaking of him, they were able to keep some friendship. They wouldn’t be able to hang out alone and feel comfortable about it but it wasn’t awkward if they were in a – large – group.

 

Predictably, there were rumours that she used Brian as a beard. She got over it; everyone that mattered knew he wasn’t. She was happy with Alex and that’s all that mattered to her.

 

Their relationship had admittedly been different. Not a bad different but it did sometimes dawn on her she was doing this with a girl. She was happy though and found that she and Alex clicked so well.

 

Funnily enough, her parents weren’t nearly as strict with Alex being in her room as they were with Brian. Most likely it was because neither could get the other pregnant. Not that they’d had sex yet, hanging out mostly consisted of reading together or watching movies. Not that she was against having sex; she knew it’d be different. But she wanted to… God she really wanted to.

 

“So my parents are going out of town this weekend.” Alex said as they laid on her bed, glancing up on the book she was reading.

 

“Uh hu.” Jack replied, not bothering to look up from her own book.

 

“You want to stay over? If your parents are cool with it?”

 

Jack glanced at her girlfriend and smiled. “Sure.” She smiled.

 

So after some convincing her parents, Jack found herself ready to stay at Alex’s. She was so excited to spend time with her over this weekend. Some real alone time together would be great.

 

“You can just leave your stuff there.” Alex said, nodding to her desk.

 

After setting her stuff aside Alex asked if Jack wanted anything to eat. She avoided saying ‘you’ as a joke. “You decide.”

 

They went with pizza and were soon sharing a large chicken pizza and watching The Fault in Our Stars in Alex’s room.

 

“Ansel Elgrot is so hot.” Jack said mindlessly, as her head laid in Alex’s lap.

 

Alex chuckled, feeding Jack instead of bothering to respond.

 

“You’re quiet tonight.” Jack commented.

 

“Am I?” Alex mumbled.

 

“Yeah, you usually never shut up.”

 

“Tired, I guess.”

 

“Mhm.” Jack mumbled and smiled as Alex ran her fingers through Jack’s hair.

 

Once both the movie and pizza had finished, the two girls were making out on the bed, Alex on top of Jack, her fingers running through her short jet black hair.

 

“Did I ever tell you,” Alex mumbled against her lips. “I love that blonde streak in your hair. First thing I noticed ‘bout you.”

 

“I guess we both have noticing each other’s hair in common.” Jack laughed, and pulled Alex back to her lips.

 

They’d been kissing for a while and for lack of a better word, Jack was getting horny. She wasn’t sure how to bring it up to Alex but she soon realised she didn’t need to say anything because she felt Alex’s hand creep up her shirt. She grazed her fingers against Jack’s skin, circling her finger around her navel. She didn’t go any higher than that, Jack sensing her hesitation.

 

“You can go higher, y’know.” Jack mumbled against her lips. She sensed Alex hesitate for a moment before moving her hand higher. She didn’t touch her breast, instead grazing the bottom for Jack’s bra. Her hand held onto the other girl’s ribcage, continuing to kiss her.

 

Jack pulled away, sensing Alex was tense. “You okay?” Jack asked.

 

Alex blushed. “I uh… I maybe, sort of invited you here so we could uh… so we could…” she looked down at her lap, her hair falling in her face, avoiding Jack’s eyes.

 

Jack smiled at her girlfriend, reaching her hand to push Alex’s hair out of her face. “You know I wanna too.”

 

“I do know.” Alex replied, meeting Jack’s eye. “I’ve just, never done this before.”

 

“That’s fine, Lexi.” Jack replied, using the affectionate nickname she’d come to call Alex. “I don’t want to force you into anything.”

 

“You’re _not_.” Alex said. “I’ve just never opened up to someone like this.”

 

“Okay gold star,” Jack said, Alex chuckling at the comment. “You trust me, right?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“So can you trust me now? If you really want to do this, we can. It doesn’t matter to me you haven’t done this before. Hell, I’ve only ever had sex with Brian. So we’re both inexperienced.”

 

Alex smiled at her and leaned back down to kiss Jack again, running her fingers through Jack’s short hair. She let her other hand go under Jack’s shirt again, this time not hesitating to cup Jack’s breast over her bra. Jack let out a small moan as Alex pressed Jack’s nipple through the fabric of her bra.

 

Jack fiddled with the hem of Alex’s shirt, and slowly tried to pull it up. Alex smiled and pulled away to pull it off properly, Jack’s shirt following in suit.

 

With their lips connected, Jack reached to Alex’s back to unclip her bra. She felt Alex smile against her lips, and tossed her bra aside with the lips still connected. Jack, still under Alex, moved her lips to Alex’s chest, leaving a trail of sweet kisses. Alex let out a small moan, pulling her head back.

 

Jack reached for the clasp of her own bra, tossing it to the side. Jack moved her mouth to Alex’s left breast, her tongue pressing against the nipple. Alex let out another moan and Jack felt her shutter from the pleasure. “Jack.” She moaned.

 

Jack began to suck on the nipple, her hand pressing against the nipple of Alex’s other breast. She wanted to get lower though, so she let her hand go to unbutton Alex’s jeans, pulling them down. Alex kicked them off leaving her in nothing but her wet, lacy panties. Jack moved back to Alex’s lips, and slipped her hand under Alex’s panties. She rubbed Alex, their lips still connected. Alex grinds her hips to feel Jack’s finger more. Jack moved her free hand to pull Alex’s panties off, giving her easier access.

 

She really wanted to do more though, so she rolled them over so Jack was on top of Alex. She kissed Alex one last time before crawling between Alex’s legs. Alex was panting, and spread her legs, ready for Jack.

 

Jack surprised herself by how confident she was. She’d never done this before but she wasn’t anywhere near as nervous as she would’ve been a few months ago. She was ready to go right in. With her head between Alex’s thighs, Jack spread Alex’s labia and slipped her tongue between them.

 

“F-fuck Jack.” Alex moaned. Jack pressed her tongue further into Alex, feeling a sense of accomplishment at Alex’s reaction. With her tongue still inside Alex, she moved her hand above her thumb and pressed her thumb against Alex’s clit. Alex let out small screams of pleasure, moaning ‘yes’ as Jack pressed both her tongue and thumb more firmly on Alex.

 

After a few minutes, Alex reached her climax, panting as Jack moved away.

 

Alex smiled at her girlfriend. “Wow, and you say you’ve never done that before.”

 

“Shut up, I guess I’m just good with my tongue.”

 

Alex rolled her eyes. “Your turn.” She grinned.

 

Jack grinned and moved to lie on her back down. She spread her legs ready to feel like Alex just did.

 

“Hold on, I wanna do something.” Alex got off of Jack, Jack whining a little. “Oh hush, you’ll like this.” She walked over to her chest of draws and opened the draw. Jack watched as she searched for whatever she was getting with a confused look on her face. When Alex closed the draw, Jack saw in Alex’s hand a vibrator.

 

“God, it really is always the quiet ones.” Jack laughed.

 

“Do you want me to use it on you or not?”

 

Jack grinned. “Go ahead.”

 

After plugging it in, Alex settled between Jack’s legs. She switched it on and placed it lightly on Jack’s clit, over her wet panties. Jack made a small gasp and let out a small moan. She’d never used a vibrator before, mostly due to not having access to one, so the sensation was unfamiliar but incredible. And, she’d admit, the thought of Alex using this on herself was really hot.

 

Alex brought her lips to Jack’s, her tongue gently grazing Jack’s bottom lip, a smirk playing on her lips as she pressed it firmer to Jack. Figuring out what turned Jack on and what made her feel good sounded like a fun experience. She’d be lying if there was a tinge of fear she wouldn’t be as good as Jack’s ex, Brian; mostly because she’d never done this before. She’d even gone as far as trimming her nails and researching how to do this properly (because let’s be honest, lesbian porn was nowhere near accurate). But by the sound of it, Jack was enjoying the hell out of it.

 

“Alex, oh my God!” she moaned against her lips, and her body shook as she reached her climax. Alex turned the vibrator off, and smiled as she stood up.

 

“Okay, wow.” Jack said, panting lightly. “Not bad for a virgin.”

 

“Oh fuck off.” Alex laughed lightly.

 

“But that was different.”

 

“Good different?”

 

“Always good different.” Jack replied, and pulled Alex down to kiss her.

**Author's Note:**

> I actually love this one so much.


End file.
